Thursday, July 10, 2008
Dear Old Henry
When I arrived at FEMA my complete knowledge of martial arts included a 3 month period at a karate school, one PAWMA camp, and I’d seen Karate Kid many, many times. All I really knew is, I wanted to do super cool kung fu stuff. My first class at FEMA was in Monday night taiji. I was so happy to be training that I didn’t notice how slow we were going. After a little more than a year of training, the opportunity came to train in Shanghai, China. I couldn’t believe that I might get to go to China where I was sure we were gunna do kung fu movie stuff. Yes!! I signed up. This was to be the first time I would meet our teacher’s teacher, Shigong Alex Feng, and the 3rd time ever for me to ride in a plane. After some discussion between Shifu and Shigong, it was decided I would train in the Yang style taiji 24 form when we reached China. “Oh boy”, I thought as memories of Henry suddenly bubbled up, “now I’m on a slow horse to China!”
After 14 hours of my constant concentration psychically helping the pilot fly the plane, and what I consider to be pure magic, we landed safely in Shanghai. The next day I found myself in a large arena with the most spectacular gung fu action taking place. Shifu training in a twin dao (sword) form, Shijie Tina with whip chain, and there were countless other awe inspiring activities all around me. I, meanwhile, began with the taiji walk. This was excruciatingly slow progression as the teacher, Mrs. Zong, taught me correct placement of my feet, wrist, thumbs, hands, chin and so forth. Where was the form? When did I get to learn to fly around in bamboo trees? Would I EVER get to go any FASTER?! With dear old Henry plodding around in my memory, at least I knew better than to complain this time.
So okay, actually some of that gung fu stuff looked really scary. Also, there were bruises that were large and colorful. Ouch. Maybe I secretly started to be happy to be going slow, realizing that perhaps I enjoy the taiji walk more than flying around in trees. I mean, who am I kidding, I really do hate to fly. At the end of two weeks of training, which included an entire day of “Cloud Hands Hell”, I still wasn’t performing awesome gung fu. I did however, have a deep desire to continue training. I couldn’t wait to return home and learn more from Shifu.
Once we were home, I made a few discoveries. Like taiji class was often the only thing that would help me show up for Monday classes when I knew it was a judo night. Taiji became the practice that would renew my energy and set my foundation for attempting those fancy gung fu moves and judo throws. What happens when I’m trying to learn something that moves quickly? In order to feel success, I practice “taiji” speed for awhile. And lo and behold, quite often those awesome gung fu moves come from a taiji form!
The 9 year old me lost interest in horseback riding and never placed in any competition. But there’s an important gift I received from that short period in my life that has helped me immeasurably in my current training. I’m grateful that my days with Henry gave me the good sense not to whine about going too slow and to continue on even when I wasn’t getting what I thought I wanted. Now I can often recognize that I’m getting what I need at the time. Sure enough, it becomes every thing I’d like to have anyway. Thank you to all my teachers, and Henry, I hope I’ve done you proud. ☺
Respectfully submitted 7/6/08
By Airn Sheahan
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Meditation on breathing
For many years, I've stopped once in a while to enjoy breathing. Sometimes I do this every day, sometimes I forget until something reminds me. I think youraverage person on the street would be baffled by this– what's to enjoy? It's breathing. Everyone does it.
The first time I thought of this, I had a bad cold,with stuffy nose, dry mouth, and aching throat, until it was unpleasant and painful no matter how I tried to breathe. I tried telling myself it could be worse –I've had asthma attacks where every breath was painful and my lungs were so tight I felt like I would suffocate. This didn't ease my misery really, but I decided that when I could breathe normally again, I'd take a minute to enjoy it. I needed to get through this cold until I could try this new idea. It sounded kind of weird, and I'm always ready to try some new, weird thing.
Since then, I've tried to remember to do this fairly often. Sometimes I just marvel at the easy, natural ebb and flow of air, in and out again.
Sometimes I take a big, deep breath, loving the way I can take in all the air I want, keep it for as long as I like, then when I'm tired of it, let it go and get some more.
And all this air is free! It's good stuff, too, not like when I was a kid. Especially downtown, I try to notice how the air these days is crystal clear and sweet. I remember when every car, truck, and bus had it's own little gray-brown cloud behind it. I used to hold my breath a bit when a bus went by, because they smelled so bad. All the pollution control and air quality laws passed in the past thirty years have had a tremendous impact. Nowadays, you could almost suck the stuff straight out of the tail pipes.
When I have a chance to lay down in the fresh grass, I sometimes think about our symbiotic relationship with plants. Exhaling nice, moist, carbon dioxide ladenair all over the grass, then inhaling the sweet,oxygen rich air the grass gives off in return. I hope the grass enjoys this as much as I do.
So enjoy breathing. Pay attention to the smooth flow,the natural way your body knows just how much it needs, and the easy availability of air. Take a moment to breathe freely.
Enjoy it.
-Jaqi
- Shanna
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not in just some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
-Nelson Mandela
Inaugural speech, 1994